As a widow ages, she may want to remain in her own home because of her memories. But for many, their declining health may make that impossible.
Moving from the home you shared with your husband to a new place is never easy and a widow may not even be sure if a move is the right thing to do.
You don’t have to be old and sick before you make the decision to move. Many widows move because they want a smaller place with less maintenance. Others move because it will provide a more social environment or make their financial life a little easier.
The last thing you want to deal with is another major change in your life, so don’t take this step until you are ready.
Some signs that you may be ready to move are:
- The house is less kept up and maintenance isn’t being done.
- Expenses for heat, taxes and insurance are hard to pay.
- Too many steps make it difficult to get around the house.
- It’s hard to keep the outside walkways shoveled in the winter.
- You don’t have a social life or see many people.
- The house feels empty and too lonely for one person.
- You are thinking more and more about moving to a smaller place.
You can talk this over with friends and family but remember that the decision is not reversible, so the time to change has to be when it feels right to you.
Di
I am currently going through this right now. My husband passed away 8 years ago and I retired 3 years ago at 66. Now almost 69, I am feeling myself slow down a lot and I have less interest in yard work. (It takes me over two hours to cut the grass.) Every year since retirement I have hired people to do carpentry, masonry work, plowing my driveway in the winter (I am still shoveling paths), new hot water heater and the list goes on…I am putting thousands into repairs.
We moved to this house in 1980 and have collected and inherited a lot of stuff. I am in the process of downsizing my stuff before I really look for something new. After this task is completed, I will be painting the interior and staining whatever trim that I can reach outside.
Very stressful.
I feel isolated.
I have started by working with a trusted real estate agent to sell a piece of land next door to my house.
Any suggestions or advice would be appreciated. A condo looks like a good idea in my future.
Mary Francis
Hi Di. I can relate to all the house and yard work. I finally moved into a condo. No maintenance, around the clock security and I can travel with no responsibilities of a house. Very social building even though at this time I don’t get involved, but it’s there for when I want it. Hope this helps, Mary
Di
Hi Mary,
Thanks for your reply.
I am in the process of having carpentry work done now. Also in the process of clearing out my house by donating or selling items.
Thankfully, it is Summer and I am in good health, so that I can get a lot of this done. I do not want to wait until last minute to downsize my stuff. Also, I have exterior staining and painting that I want to do. When the house is in tip top shape, then I can really look into condos, without being pressured. (Who needs more stress?!)
I know people, who were in such a rush, sold their house and then went crazy looking for a new one. Unfortunately, they finally settled on a house, only to be a money pit. I feel bad for them. I guess I have learned from other’s mistakes…I know I will make my own mistakes.
Take care,
Di
Di
Hi Mary,
Just came home with a weekend with my sister and family who live in VT. Wonderful time.
On Tuesday, I saw a great real estate listing in the next town from me. One floor condo/ ranch attached. I looked at it on Tuesday and knew that it was for me. Made an offer, which the owner accepted today. Yay! I am so looking forward to living there. There are lots of walking paths and an historic river near it. Close to grocery stores. No yard work. Low condo fees. No more shoveling snow, yard work, etc. I am very happy about this.
Thank you, Mary, for being an inspiration for me.
Di