Living Apart Together

Are you thinking about dating again?  It’s a big decision for most widows so I thought I would let you know about the big trend for our generation called “Living Apart Together”.

It’s the new thing for us boomers – we are committed to this new relationship, we are completely faithful to each other but are not getting married or living together.

It’s the widows who are making the decision to be “LATs” or “Apartners” as it’s sometimes called.  One of the reasons is financial – they want to ensure that their assets are left to their children.  That may get complicated if you live together so this keeps it clean and easy.

The other reason is that men want to be married or living together because they get taken care of.  Widows are getting wise to this and are keeping it as a faithful “dating relationship”.

Getting married does create a psychological shift and the expectations change when you’re married or living together.  But for some, marriage is the goal and if that’s you than go for it.  But if it isn’t than I hope this little postings has helped you realize that you’re not alone in the “Living Apart Together” world.

6 Responses

  1. Lou

    I was very happy to come across this post.  I have never heard the LAT term but I have been in just such a relationship with a widower for 1.5 years now.  He has his place, I have mine and we get together and travel frequently.  So far, so good. I was married for many years, divorced, remarried and widowed after a brief marriage.   This current situation works for both of us.  There is no less love or commitment than if we were married, in fact,  I feel much healthier knowiing that I am with him for all the right reasons and still need to take care of my own future and finances.

  2. Michelle

    Where was this site a year ago? I guess I wasn’t looking right. I’m so glad this site is here. Thank you for doing this for us widows.

  3. Mary Francis

    Thank you Michelle I lost my husband nine years ago and found myself lost in my grief. This website has been growing over the years as I’ve healed. It is for widows and gives us a place to find support and also to offer support. Please join in the new “Community for Widows” and offer your story and support to others.

  4. Michelle

    Definitely will do the. Is it easier now?

  5. Michelle

    Definitely will do the. That is what I wanted to do. I’m keeping a journal starting from when he passed. I want to see how I progress over time

  6. Mary Francis

    Yes Michelle it is easier, but it is still a journey with ups and downs. Mary Francis

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