You may have been independent in your marriage and so you didn’t fall apart due to having to make all the decisions, paying bills etc. but the finality of their death can still overwhelm you. You can’t listen to the music you both enjoyed together and meals out are just unbearable without them. You just don’t know how to keep living with whatever time you have left. You may also have lived to an age where many friends, neighbors and family members have already died.
The worst thing may be coming into that dark and empty house that was once a happy home. You have come to accept their death but life just doesn’t hold any appeal and it just seems like too much work to change. Does this sum up how you feel?
It may not be uncommon for you to visit the gravesites every day and talk to your loved one about your day as if they were still here. Eventually you will find other activities for your time but right now if you feel at peace visiting the gravesite than don’t let anyone discourage you. Experts say that it can sometimes take months for a widow, married for most of their life, to understand that her spouse is really no longer with her.
Grief, when stifled and ignored, can become exaggerated, complicated and unhealthy. The only way out of grief is to go through it to get to the healing part of your journey.
I know that you can cope with whatever feelings arise – after all, we women are the stronger sex. You have life experiences, skills and support that you can use to heal. I encourage you to bring your grief out into the open and voice your feelings so that you may understand that you can and will make it.
For more on this please check out all the free resources as well as my Guides, which are full of advice and support. You don’t have to travel this journey alone.
We need to support each other, so I’m asking you to share your words of advice with other widows who are also on this journey .