Rapid mood changes are typical when widows are grieving. Widow’s are often doing good and then without any apparent reason, they take an emotionally down turn and are unable to stop crying.
Maybe it was triggered by a conversation with a friend or a song on the radio. You feel even worse because by now you feel that you should be in better control of your moods. This is just a sign that you are not completely done your grief. Take your time and remember that sometimes the years will go by and you can still have a rapid mood change caused by grief.
You may be afraid to trust your emotions because of your inability to control them. Sometimes you want to protect yourself by becoming “emotional numb” and stop yourself from feeling anything. But it’s healthier to let yourself feel the pain and the emotions so that you can work your way through it.
A widow’s grief will settle into healing and our memories will be with us till the day we die. As time goes on we will learn to enjoy our memories without letting them affect our moods.