How Do Widows Handle Celebrations?

In May 2007 I turned fifty years old and I was married. Donnie and I were looking forward to being empty nesters and we had such great plans for our future. But life has its own plans and in September Donnie died suddenly.

So this May 2017 I turned sixty years old and I’ve been widowed for almost ten years. This was a big turning point in my life as I retired from my full time career plus I’m now officially a senior.

How do you go about celebrating a major birthday without your loved one? I didn’t make any big plans as I thought I would have a quiet lunch with my sisters and maybe supper out with some friends. But this is the amazing thing about life, just when you think that you have it all together, it goes off and does its own thing.

My sisters and friends got together (unknown to me) to plan a huge surprise 60th birthday party for me. They got me good as I totally didn’t see it coming. How blessed I was to have all my family, children, grandchildren and friends come together to celebrate my life.

What can you say when your sisters tell you how fortunate you are to have such great friends and your friends tell you how lucky you are to have such great sisters. Sometimes it takes these special celebrations to make you realize what you still have in life.

After all these years I still miss Donnie but I’ve learned to handle celebrations as occasions to enjoy those that I still have in my life.

4 Responses

  1. A.B. Taylor

    Suggestions on 1st wedding anniversary–still in grieving process but want this to be a memorable day??

  2. Mary Francis

    Dear A.B. Taylor – first congratulations on your anniversary and they should all be celebrated because they are important to us. Everyone is different so would treat the day in their own special and unique way. Did you have a special place/music/flowers etc. that you did together? I would start thinking along those lines and I’m sure you will find the perfect way to make it a memorable day. The very best to you, Mary Francis

  3. Bridget Pertlicek

    I lost my dear husband Fritz on April 29, 2017 to mesothelioma after almost 3 years of fighting it. I have been dreading our coming anniversary in August. I have decided that on that day I will attend a Mass that I had said for him at our church. Then I will go out to lunch with my sister, and finally have a massage. He bought me a gift card for the massage for my birthday and I have been saving it.
    I miss him so much after 42 years. We did everything together, even the little things and were never apart. I unfortunately could not have children so it was always just the two of us. I feel so often that he is still here and feel his energy in this house we occupied for 39 years. I want to celebrate the wonderful marriage we had even if he isn’t physically present.

  4. Mary Francis

    Hi Bridget – I love that your going to celebrate the wonderful marriage you had. We should never forget our happy memories and always treasure them. Take care of yourself and please keep up the positive and uplifting outlook. Mary Francis

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