I am not alone, but I am lonely
Hi Ladies, I lost my husband just before Christmas last year and a week before my birthday. I was living in Orlando Fl. My husband was an American. We would have been together for 15 years last Feb. He was my second husband. I am 58, not young, not old, but scared of being without someone in my life.
Right now I live with my son and his family. He gave me the space in his basement and it is lovely. As my title says I am not alone. He has 3 small children and I love them dearly.
I miss my best friend, my husband was a very good man to me. It is the little things I miss, his I love you all day long or the hug that came out of no where, or the caress on my hip when I came to bed at night.
He was 63 when he passed, he was a vet and the Dr's there did not catch one of the 5 things wrong with him. Protocol is what I got from them. He may of been 63, but looked 93. I am not angry at him, I am angry at them. I asked for help and received none.
I had to do everything on my own down there, from selling the house to cancelling utilities. One thing after another I had blocks to deal with.
I knew I was moving back to Canada and my son offered the basement of his house. I do love it here and it helps to keep busy.
I have found no place to go to for help with my grief. I just need someone to listen. Don't worry I will find someplace to go in this small town.
Like many of you I go through each day with a smile and try not to think of my grief. I have days that it is difficult and of course I cry.
My son doesn't like to see his Mom upset and like most men they do not know what to do.
As for me to get myself out there, I do not have a driver's license anymore. I need to get that again and that is a 30 mile drive to the next city. I will find a way of course. Still getting my bearings here. But if you want to know anything about a place, ask a cab driver.
I am a very independent person and do not like to rely on others. Time will tell how my life will unfold.