Below is an email I received with permission to pass it on. Widows helping widows – that is what it’s all about.
To: Mary Francis
Subject: Your Chapter
Well done Mary! I was impressed. Our guys are not replaceable that’s for sure. There were several phases that really caught me,
– Everyone dies and it’s not avoidable.
– Only God knows how much time you have.
– I’m afraid of growing old and having regrets for people and places I never made the effort to explore.
– ..people are more important while things have lost their appeal.
– I didn’t have to cater to other people’s needs all the time. I started to slowly change as circumstances forced me into a new lifestyle. I questioned my habits…
– (about the lawnmower)… No one used it but Donnie and the first time I had to start it up and mow the lawn I cried the whole time.
– I have made room for friends in my life.
– (about grief) That’s ok, I let it have its time, but I make an effort to keep moving so it doesn’t find a home in my soul.
And the most profound;
‘The greatest thing in the world is to have someone exclusively of your own – to love, to trust and to share’.
There were so many others Mary. I have scribbled and highlighted all over it. It gave me a sense of peace to read it and I will many times. I hope you are very proud of your accomplishment. If you are like me, unfortunately death spurred us on to an area we wouldn’t have explored, certainly I wouldn’t have chose it, and yet you have made value from it. We need this book Mary.
You are most welcome to take excerpts (if you want) from what I wrote and forwarded to you earlier. Greif evolves and now I’m in a different place with it.
People say the spirit stays with you for a year – how they know beats me, but it scares me that the year mark is approaching, does that mean he’ll leave me? I’m becoming desolate in my own fear of being completely abandoned.
I feel like I have come to know you through your writing. That’s the part where we expose ourselves and you have done so with skill and the ultimate love of others in our situation.
Again I say well done.