I’ve found that the holidays bring out the best and worst in people. We spend time with family that we don’t always want to be with. We attend functions out of obligation or good old fashion guilt trips. There is often a family member who likes to stir things up, estranged siblings, rambunctious kids or the family drunk. Throw in crowded airports or cars and living out of a suitcase – it’s enough to make you want to run away!
If you have company coming to stay with you, than you are the host with all the added duties that go with it. You may love having the company come but in the end you can’t wait till they are gone and everything is quiet again.
When we are grieving we just don’t have the energy for people (even loved ones). I don’t ever recommend choosing isolation but if you don’t want to partake, don’t. There is no need for excuses or lies, just say no. A simple, yet firm, “no thank you” is sufficient.
On the other hand you may have the most amazing people in your life and you simply adore spending time with them. But the holidays bring with it an overwhelming sense of sadness and loss. It’s hard facing the never ending and inappropriate questions others feel the need to ask. Remember this, “You don’t owe anyone an explanation of your feelings or details about your grief.”