Widows need to talk, to share their stories and memories. Fortunately, most of us know that talking to a compassionate person can help heal our emotional pain, but if along with grief we carry anger and bitterness, we can get stuck.
Are you honoring your feelings or stewing in them? Does it help to talk about your trauma or are you left unhappier? Is your brooding intensifying into depression?
Instead of going over and over what you have lost, try to focus on what you have. Example, instead of thinking of all the years you’re not going to have him in your life, focus on the years you did have him – ending with “we didn’t have as long as others, but we had more love than most people dream of.”
It’s important to find an accepting, empathetic person to talk to. Talk about your pain but also about your love and happy memories. These aren’t stories of self-pity – it’s part of your life, where you can find a way to honor your story without sinking beneath it.