The Empty Chair

Last night I went to my nieces wedding. It’s been eleven years since Donnie’s death and you would think that I would be used to that empty chair across from me – but I’m not and I don’t think I will ever be. It’s hard to set at a table for eight, husbands on one side and their wives on the other side.

Expect for me, I had that empty chair, but the place setting was still set up as if someone was going to be sitting there.

My sister joked that if was like I had the perfect husband, silent and no effort needed. It threw me off as that empty chair is a reflection of Donnie not being with me for all the family events. I always find Christmas and all the social get togethers hard. I left after the meal as there is no enjoyment in watching all the couples dancing.

I just thought I would share so that all you other widows would understand that our grief does not have a time length and its okay to miss them, even if its been eleven years. As we honor our Veteran’s today lets also honor our loved ones and be grateful for the times and memories we still have.

5 Responses

  1. Rosa
    | Reply

    A year and half in to my widowhood, I am beginning to understand this. Especially now with the upcoming Holidays. I feel your pain.

  2. Linda
    | Reply

    As I approach the Holiday’s and the first year anniversary of my husband’s passing, I feel confused, lost, not really in the mood to celebrate anything. I would be happy just to crawl up in a hole and wait till it all blows over.

    • Mary Francis
      | Reply

      Holidays are hard when we are grieving and our hearts are broken.

      I have a Guide – Surviving the Holidays and Special Occasions available as download on my website. It is filled with tips, support and encouragement to help you through the holiday season.

      You can read the free sample from this link

      Take care, Mary Francis

  3. Deborah Surber
    | Reply

    I can relate to all the comments. It’s been a little over two years and the thought of “Holidays” makes me want to disappear until Jan. 2nd. I love my family and being able to see them during this time of year but I can’t seem to find the joy and wonder if it will ever return. I have found peace however, dwelling on the True Meaning of Christmas and for this I am thankful!

    • Mary Francis
      | Reply

      Hi Deborah. I’m sorry for your loss and thank you for reaching out to others to let them know that “peace” comes and it helps to be thankful. There is a Holiday Guide available as a download and It has a free sample that may help. Take care. Mary Francis

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