A Widow’s First Christmas

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If you have a friend or family member going through their first Christmas, you need to tread carefully around their emotions.

If there is a get together and they hear that you invited everyone but them, they are likely to conclude that you are callously leaving them out because their a widow.

On the other hand, if you send them an invitation, they may think you have callously forgotten that they are grieving and not ready to run around partying with others.

You can’t win when there are only two choices – send an invitation or not.

Maybe, there is a third choice and that is a personal call to say how much you miss them, ask if you can stop in for a visit and then mention that you would be thrilled to see them at the party if they are up to it.

Of course, this obligates you to follow up with a visit, but that is what nice people do when their friend or family member is hurting.

If you are the widow, than understand just how confusing it is to those that care about you.  They don’t know what to say and do, and the holidays make them even more unsure.  Please have patience with them, and don’t hesitate to tell them what you need.  They will thank you for it.

  1. Darlene
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    I became a widow on June 28, 2018 so this is my first Christmas without my sweet husband. It’s Christmas Eve and I’m alone with my dog. I’m sure I could have gone to spend the evening with my daughter and her family but I chose to be alone. I needed time to reflect on the 43 Christmases my husband and I shared. I’m very sad and lonely but I will survive. Tomorrow I will spend the day with my daughter and her family and I will do the very best I can. This journey is very difficult but I’m determined to find happiness again. Thank you for allowing me to share.

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