It’s more than the negative that you’re going to die, it can also be the positive if you are mature enough to understand that you’re going to die, and that causes you to live a better life because of it.
If you have found meaning in your life, you don’t want to go back in time. Instead you want to move forward, see more and do more. If you’re always battling against your future, always wanting the past, you’re always going to be unhappy because life goes on and it doesn’t matter what you tell yourself.
The issue is to accept who you are and be happy in that. This is your time. You have to find what’s good and true and beautiful in your life as it is now. Looking back will not move you forward.
Culture doesn’t encourage us to think about life’s regrets until we are about to die. We are so wrapped up with family, career, having enough money and all the trillions of little acts just to keep going. So we don’t get still enough to look at our lives and ask, “Is this all? Is something missing?”
We need someone to probe us in that direction. It won’t just happen automatically as we grow older. For us widows, it’s the death of our loved one that gets us asking, “Is this all?” It makes us realize that aging is a blessing and it provides many opportunities for growth. We all want that growth and clarity on what is important in our lives.
Everyone knows they are going to grow older and die, but they don’t believe it. If they did, they would live differently. Don’t fool yourself, instead prepare for it – that way you can actually be more involved in your life while you’re living.
Every morning ask, “Is this the day? Am I ready? Am I doing all I need to do? Am I being the person I want to be?”
The truth is that once you learn how to die, you learn how to live.