Life changed for us the moment we lost our spouse, but Covid-19 Isolation has made it all very, very difficult to deal with on our own. No visits, no hugs, no human connection and all this just when we need it the most.
Yes, life has shifted in a major way, but since the pandemic began, we’ve been suffering our grief in silence. Our grief has been put into a strange “waiting period” where it is waiting for the support, and hugs we would normally receive after a funeral.
Recognize that our feelings are valid and if we can’t get the support in person than we need to connect by phone calls, text, email, Facebook, Zoom, online groups, etc.
Don’t downplay your grief as that will only intensify your pain and feelings of isolation. Instead, honor how you feel by either writing it out in a journal or talking to those that understand.
Our loss has shifted our lives and the way we see the world around us. Write down the things that are no longer part of you, from the loss of your loved one to what it means to be single in your life. Now write out the possibilities going forward after the Covid-19 isolation, when things return to open visits.
I know we are all tired of the restrictions caused by Covid-19, but maybe it’s time to go back to an old and true form of communication – becoming a pen pal! Write a letter to a neighbor or local friend, put it in a basket with paper, a pen, envelopes and a few stamps, asking them to write you back. Or go to Google and search “Become a Pen Pal” to see if there are some pen pal programs you can join.
If a pen pal isn’t for you, but yet human contact is what you are looking for, than you can request to join my closed and private Facebook page just for widows (called “The Sisterhood of Widows – Private Group for Widows”). Please make sure you answer all the security questions and agree to follow the group rules, otherwise the request will be denied.
What can you do while in isolation? Can you find comfort by taking daily walks in a park or forest? Since spending a long time inside can lead to sensory deprivation, we need to get outside into a green space. Researchers believe that taking a stroll in a park or forest can not only lift our moods, but also make it easier to cope with stress. Grievers who walk in green spaces have a stronger sense of meaning in life and feel more ready to deal with what is happening around them.
I read somewhere that it helps to grieve our loss with kindness. Example: try taping encouraging notes to your mirrors, fridge and night stand to read for something positive to hold onto. Be kind to yourself, always talking positive self-talk.
I am so very sorry that you are grieving at this time in history. Covid-19 isolation is real and no widow should have to grieve without the support of family and friends.