Widows Matter

Widows matter so I’m asking you, “What are you doing for yourself today?”  I hope that you are doing something that you love and rarely do, something that will rejuvenate your soul.

There is nothing like losing your spouse to erase your to do list and what you thought was top priority.  We all hope to come out of this present darkness with a better sense of who we are and to even create another life for ourselves so that we can live and love again.

These simple questions will get you thinking about how you’re spending your time.

  • What is the best value for my time?
  • Do I have a purpose?
  • What am I giving up to do this?
  • Is this for me?

Whenever you choose to do something, even if it is to stay in front of the T.V., you are giving up a piece of your life for it.  Once you recognize the true cost of an activity, you have a clearer understanding of how you want to spend your time.

Sometimes it takes a while to find the answers to these questions, but be patient and keep asking until you are comfortable with the answers.

I hope you will be able to find at least one thing that you enjoy and do it for yourself today.  I know you are struggling to find yourself, but please find a simple pleasure to do.  A bubble bath, listening to your favorite music, quiet walk in your area, a kind word to a service worker or a smile to a stranger.

Remember this is for “You”.  It doesn’t mean that you are forgetting your spouse, your past or your memories and moving on.  Instead, you are carrying them with you as you map out a new life and move forward.

I know those first few years are painful, but our broken hearts do heal.  I don’t worry like I used to and I think it’s because I was touched by grief and I realized that the worst has come and yet I’m still standing.

Please help others by sharing my blog postings with those that are grieving.  Let them know that doing special things for themselves will rejuvenate their spirit and help their broken hearts heal.

Taking care of “You” in the present, leaves little time to worry about either the past or future.  Your journey is about today and what you choose to do with it.

5 Responses

  1. Naomi Solscheid
    | Reply

    I lost my husband Gregory on February 22, 2021. I have been still dealing with the guilt and such deep loss and sadness it’s hard to make it through the day. I am trying to do something special for myself. It’s very hard. This site has been a tremendous help to me.

  2. Peggy
    | Reply

    I lost my husband, Larry, February 5, 2021. I can’t even say his name without bursting into tears. I still feel like I’m in a fog and I can’t breathe. This site has allowed me to be me without judgment and to grieve my way. It has been so encouraging.

  3. Karen A
    | Reply

    Thank you. This is very helpful. I am going to focus on me a little bit. It’s 6 months today. It is so hard. Thank you for providing great support.

  4. Eddah
    | Reply

    I lost my husband Adrian on the 16/12/2021….so painful

  5. Luanne Reilly
    | Reply

    I lost my husband Bill, November 8, 2021. Very painful and have experience guilt, pain, sorrow, anger, disbelief, and a very real emotional emptiness. Broken hearted.

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