I talk about my grief all the time, but it doesn’t seem to help.

I know it’s hard once you lose your loved one. I relate it to being on a double highway with someone to share the journey with and then all of a sudden you are in the ditch and by yourself. Sure you get out of the ditch but now you’re on a single lane highway without a map.

If you don’t want to be wandering aimlessly, you will have to reframe your life and write out a new map. Consider yourself the storyteller of your life, talk about your heroes, struggling with your dragons and facing the loneliness of being single. Write your story from the hero’s perspective and describe how you faced your despair and turned it into newfound strengths.

This is where disclosing the tough stuff by writing it all out with the intention of letting it go, will help you to grieve and heal. There is much more on dealing with your grief in my Guide – Grieving and Healing.  You can get it for free as a download off website.

Meanwhile, find a quiet place where you will not be disturbed for at least half an hour. Write about it all, including any thoughts or feelings you have. Do not edit what you write, just write out in a steady stream of emotion.

• What have you fought and learned?
• What lessons do you have to pass on to your children and grandchildren?
• How have you become a better person?
• What struggles and injustices did you overcome?
• What are your strengths, weaknesses and disappointments?

Writing in a journal has a powerful positive effect on your immune system and physical well-being, but more important it is a way to release difficult emotions that cannot be spoken out into the world.  I believe that written thoughts have the capacity to create and reframe our lives.

True, our lives don’t look like what we had planned but perhaps some new thoughts can help us reduce our stress and gain a broader understanding of what we still have to be thankful for.

  1. Tracey Peters
    | Reply

    That was very helpful thank you. I have struggled with grief in my life and would like to help others during their time of grief.

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