What are the Goals of a Widow?

What Are Your Goals? What gives you the best value for your time? That indicates what you should do. Remember time spent is forever gone – it’s not like money that can be earned.

Don’t let fear get in your way. Maybe more to the point is – what would you like to leave as a legacy? Do you live life to the fullest? After you’re gone what would you like people to say about you?

Ask yourself: What do I want to do with the remaining years of my life?

You are free to be yourself without trying to please your parents or grown children. You may be here to be the very best parent/ grandparent there is or do some volunteer work that is calling your name. Whatever it is, you find yourself when you have a purpose or goal that you’re working towards.

Close your eyes and vision your goals. Where do you want to live? What would you like to weigh? What do you want to do in the next 6 months? Where would you like to travel? Would you like to meet new people? Pay off a bill? Learn a new skill?

Assume control of your life and you will be happier. This might be a good time to get some uplifting and inspiring art for your walls. Surround yourself with objects from nature and plants with bright colors to liven up your home. It can be fun to take charge of some easy remodeling and painting. It will give you a boost to clean out a room and rebuild it with fresh paint, plants, new artwork and less clutter.

It may take energy you don’t feel like you have, but just getting up and doing this as a project will make you feel like your accomplishing something. That feeling will help you move on to the next project and give you something positive to plan for.

We often express bewilderment at the lack of understanding from friends and families. Time and time again I hear this refrain: “but they don’t understand”.

Some friends are incapable of understanding your goals and offering support. Perhaps as time goes by your relationship with old friends will change to suit your new life, but don’t be surprised if some old friends drift away.

2 Responses

  1. Mimi
    | Reply

    I have once a month friends, Wednesday and Sunday friends other than that it’s just me and my cat. 6 1/2 yrs

  2. Diane
    | Reply

    Hi Mary Francis

    I really agree with you about assuming control of your life. (I have been a widow for 5 yrs. and retired in Sept. at 66.) I have still have sad days for sure, but now that I have more time for myself, I have been getting together with an old friend and going to yoga classes. They seem to help a great deal. Also, I am trying to clear out the clutter in my house and make life easier for myself. When I was a “fresh” widow, I could care less about the excess material stuff in my life, now I can see how “downsizing” your current living space can help. You have to make yourself get out there! In early days,
    I was given the advice by my doctor that it takes “baby steps” in the beginning. Diane

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