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Widows often have trouble
letting go of "perfect". We need to stop constantly feeling like we need to do everything perfectly. Widows may be held back from even trying because of our fear of being less than perfect.
We all deserve more because sticking only with what we are already good at creates a very small life for us. Widows feel the “social pain” when we mess up or make a mistake. We often look to others to determine what we should feel and do. Our biggest weakness is not letting go of our mistakes, not
letting go of “perfect”. That is what paralyzes us from giving it another try.
What if a mistake is made and then we let it go? I think that it helps us to grow and be more confident so that we can take on even more risks.
Letting go of “perfect” means accepting that there will be some mess ups. That’s growth and we will mess up as that’s life, but where the growth really comes is in how we react to those mess ups.
Here are a few things to think about:
- Not making mistakes and then letting them go, may be the largest mistake of all. Please, don’t let your largest regret be in not even trying.
- Keep a written journal that includes your mess ups and how you let them go. Proof that mistakes are never as horrible as we imagine.
- Try something you have been interested in but were afraid to try. Something you know you will struggle with, but with practice you feel that you can do it.
- Share your mistakes with others and cut yourself some slack. Mistakes are common and people are not judging you as harshly as you are judging yourself. Treat yourself like you would a good friend – it’s no big deal as we all make mistakes.
- If you weren’t responsible, you need to remind yourself that it’s not your fault and let it go. If you did make the mistake, accept it and then let it go. Life is about letting things go (forgiving either others or yourself) so that you can grieve and heal at a natural and healthy pace.
Question: Where am I going? Don’t assume that you must be going in the right direction just because that is the path you choose months ago. Ask yourself, “Is this really helping me?” and “If not, what changes can I make that will help me grieve and heal?” You need to be prepared as
letting go of "perfect" isn’t easy if you have been using it as your excuse for staying on the same path.
