Most people never stop grieving a death; they learn to live with it. Grief is a response, not a straight line with an endpoint Ignore oft-quoted rules and opinions that  predict how long certain types of grief should last. Learning how to grieve is ultimately part instinct, part stumbling along, part just getting up in the morning — a bit like learning how to live. The grief process isn’t a steady fade-out, like a photograph left in the sun.  Grief is a chaotic roller coaster — a mix of ups, downs, steady straight lines, and the occasional up chuck. Periods of intense sadness and pain can flare up and then fade away for the rest of your life.