All Blog Postings by Mary
Unfairness
Archive notice: This is a historical post from Mary’s years of blogging. Some older posts may mention products, courses or shop items that are no longer available, as Mary now focuses her time and energy on supporting widows inside her private Facebook community. The guidance and stories remain here as a free resource for widows.
For current ways to connect with Mary’s work, you can:
- Read her book on Amazon .
- Request to join her private Facebook group for widows .
We have to accept the unfairness of widowhood, but we don’t have to accept a future of unfair treatment. Please understand that how others treat us is directly tied to our own actions and what we allow.
Is this world fair? No, some people are married till old age while others are widowed young. Since marriages are different, then how can we say that the world is fair? We have to be careful that we aren’t heavily focused on our previous lives as married women, as it will only highlight how unfair life is.
It is very difficult to achieve fairness in this imperfect world. Of course, widows want others to treat us fairly, but scammers and con-artists are all around us. It brings unspeakable suffering when we encounter unfairness. Although we were taught to be patient and understanding, widows find it hard to stay calm when unfairness rears its ugly head. Instead we are emotional at our limit and may become angry and resentful.
An old proverb of lasting value is to “show fortitude not anger”, to stand up to unfairness and be dedicated to getting what you need to heal. Inspire others by being a widow of integrity. If we fight our way through unfairness, we can achieve the healing we need and create a brighter future.
Widows need to advocate for themselves and never give up. Without a strong will, we lack the power to propel ourselves forward. Unfairness is always a part of life, but it helps to have a strong resolve to grieve and heal in a healthy way. We should never accept less then what is fair.
Do you remember a time when you went against your gut feelings? Next time you have a “feeling” about rather something is fair or unfair, please stop and ask others for their opinions. It helps to get opinions from those that are not as emotionally involved as we are.
For lasting joy you have to learn to trust your instincts for a sense of what is unfair for you. Your instinct is a small voice, a sensation beneath the surface that tells you to pay attention.
Mary Francis, The Sisterhood of Widows
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